(Because not every hiss means hostility.)
🐾 Cats Don’t Carpool: The Leadership Blog Series
Herding Cats, Managing Chaos, and Leading with Less Hiss
If you’ve ever lived with more than one cat, you know the truth:
Sometimes it’s chaos. Sometimes it’s affection. And sometimes… You honestly can’t tell the difference.
Welcome to workplace emotional dynamics.
In every office clowder, you’ll find tension, teasing, and the occasional turf war. But not every disagreement is destructive — and not every friendship is functional.
The trick to good leadership is knowing the difference between healthy friction and toxic drama.
Let’s decode the emotional undercurrents that shape how your team interacts — before anyone starts metaphorically swatting at tails.
🐾 1. Play Fighting: The Energy of Engagement
When cats play fight, it’s about connection, not conflict. There’s energy, curiosity, and even joy — but no real intent to harm.
In the workplace, this looks like:
- Passionate debates about ideas
- Honest (but respectful) disagreement
- Teasing that strengthens rapport
- “Creative tension” that pushes projects forward
💡 Leader cue: If it’s loud but everyone leaves smiling, it’s probably play fighting. Don’t shut it down — channel it.
🐈 2. Drama: When Play Turns to Predation
When claws come out, energy shifts from collaboration to competition.
Drama drains the team instead of driving it.
Warning signs include:
- Passive-aggressive comments disguised as humor
- Eye rolls in meetings
- Cliques forming and excluding others
- Gossip replacing direct communication
💡 Leader cue: If the room goes quiet when you walk in, it’s no longer playful. Address it directly, calmly, and privately.
🧭 3. How to Tell the Difference
| Play Fighting (Healthy) | Drama (Toxic) |
|---|---|
| Teasing strengthens trust | Teasing undermines confidence |
| Disagreement stays on ideas | Conflict gets personal |
| Team feels energized | Team feels drained |
| Open communication | Whisper networks form |
| Mutual respect | Underlying resentment |
💡 Leader cue: Observe tone, body language, and emotional aftershocks. If people recover quickly and laugh later, it’s fine. If they avoid each other afterward, it’s not.
🐕 4. Your Role as the Human in the Room
You don’t have to referee every hiss.
Your job is to create an environment where healthy debate thrives and drama fizzles fast.
Try this:
- Acknowledge tension early (“Seems like this topic has some strong feelings—let’s unpack that.”)
- Set clear norms for disagreement
- Celebrate healthy collaboration publicly
- Address disrespect privately and directly
💡 Remember: people act out when they don’t feel heard. Listening is often the best de-escalation tool you have.
🐈 Final Meows
Every team has a mix of personalities — some chase, some hide, some just want everyone to share the sunny spot.
The goal isn’t to eliminate friction. It’s to make sure your team’s energy stays constructive, not corrosive.
Because sometimes, what looks like office drama…is really just your team trying to find their play rhythm.
📘 Cats Don’t Carpool: They Come in Their Own Accord explores the fine line between chaos and collaboration — and how to lead with empathy when your team feels a little “feral.”